As a child with 3 sisters and 2 brothers I was lost in the middle. My mom would tell me I was beautiful on the inside but then add God did not bless me with outward beauty like my sisters. My constant companions became my brothers. I did not have a date until I was 18 and it was with the beautiful man I married who told me from day one I was pretty. I began wearing makeup, dressing more feminine. I never understood or had heard of the masculine, feminine energy until recently. I understand it now. I still fall back into old beliefs, especially when around my sisters but I have come a long way from the shy, closed off child. I know God loves me, inside and out. Thank you, Paola and Graham, for this heartfelt conversation!
For me it’s never recognizing my self worth. I love my career and I’m confident at what I do as a virtual assistant, and I know I’m in the beginning stages but suddenly I feel myself getting very tired and exhausted all the time. I think partly it’s a self worth issue.
I also have an anxious/avoidant attachment that I am healing from childhood wounds. I was always the adult in my family. I was always alone. So being around new people or even good friends can make me nervous and anxious and fearful.
I’ve been so used to doing things alone I tend to forget it’s okay to rest and ask for help.
One of my wounds that came up tonight is my abandonment wound. I grew up in a very dysfunctional family.
Another one is my safety/money wound.
I was never taught what safe felt like and I often grew up trusting older men and praying they were safe thinking that’s how safety felt. It wasn’t until my early 30s that I started realizing how much trauma I carried.
This podcast was excellent. I had a incident when I was 16 and working. It was buried so deep in my heart. I am now in my 70's, hadn't thought about it in a very long time. I was attacked by a middle age man while getting in my car after work. When I spoke to my mom, told her what happened, the man was arrested and fired. She said to me we must never speak of this again. Thinking now maybe this why I have difficulties meeting and talking with people. I am so grateful and blessed to have you both in my life. I will work on this.
Paola and Graham, thanks for the replay of this episode, I was only able to watch part of the live, appreciate the replay to hear the entire episode. Growing up I my parents worked together as partners, they each had their own roles: mom was the “homemaker “, dad was the “ provider”, their roles at times they had to step into each others roles for a bit. There were times when I felt “ lost” as I was a middle child, I knew my parents loved me but felt my older brother and younger sister got more accolades for their accomplishments than I did..I was just okay. I feel that is where my low self-esteem/ feelings of low self worth began, it’s taken me years to rewrite the story of feeling worthy in my life and still struggle with it. Just recently it’s been very challenging for me as those childhood feeling have been resurfacing .
In my married life, my husband and I worked as partners, embracing both feminine and masculine sides at various times. I feel we both were able to step into and out of the two energies at various times in our relationship and family life. After he passed, I had to become both for myself and my children, which at times was a struggle as I just needed my partner there to help. It was an adjustment for me. My question to you, Graham and Paola, what are your thoughts regarding having to step back into that duel role full time after years of being able to step in and out of the roles? Thanks for the insightful and heartfelt conversation. Blessings!
I wish I had seen this live, but I was traveling. I was in a regarding the scars that we come from my youth, and I don’t think as a child I was scarred. I think it was as I became a teen. I was constantly compared to other people and some of the remarks from my mother we’re not very pleasant, but I learned to balance that by finding my dad‘s happy disposition and so I always took his side and became the happy-go-lucky
My father abandon me and my family when I was six years old after my 5 week old brother passed away I couldn't understand why he did that. After awhile I understood he couldn't handle the situation as the oldest girl in the family but I couldn't forget what he did after awhile for several years I for gave him,
I really enjoyed this episode I have wounds that I have been trying to get past and I have been doing well at leaving what happened in the past and moving forward to live my life happier because I can’t change what happened in my past I can only go forward so thank you graham and Paola I wish the best on your journeys I wish you a lot of luv prayers and hugs I luv listening to both of you thanks for helping understand things better I wish I had someone like you two in my earlier and younger age to help me navigate my life maybe I would have been more happier in my younger years and also did things a lot differently thanks again 😊❤️
Paola and Graham. Thanks for the reply. I feel that I am definitely like my mother, both having to be the masculine and feminine for the family and with her recent passing even more soo.
I love that you two embraced this subject. I haven't heard this kind of dialogue. There was so much propaganda about other gender BS being forced down our throats. They tried do emasculate men. As an old soul it seams I only remember feminine. I was fortunate that my parents were excellent. My father was a saintly man. He showed me what a good man should be. Girls were mean to me and my wise mom told me it was only because I was pretty and smart that they were jealous.❤️❤️❤️
Paola, I too am an old soul. I understand you. Today I get that Graham is a trigger for me. I believe it is from years of following and seeing sides that often felt very confusing. I know after watching this that I need to trust my inner voice that tells me “no more.” I keep stepping in and out and I will follow the exit sign. I wish you both an adventure that is fulfilling and rewarding. Be happy and be well.
I am trying to make myself worthy of my life I have. Have trouble feeling that I am not good enough, insecure with my life and don't know where to go from here to feel like I am worthy of myself and life
I would recommend watching the documentary called Crip Camp which is a tribute to the Disabled Community. It is a wonderful way to witness the pride of that community with physical and mental differences from people who are Able Bodied. My ex husband and father of our daughter was born with cerebral palsy from damage to his brain at birth. Both his speech and movement was impacted. He taught me a lot about living with disabilities including ones that are invisible to other people like mine. On Netflix and YouTube. Executive producers were the Obama’s. Both Steve and Emily Hofmann are included in this film released in 2020.
I enjoyed watching this episode which was very thought provoking for me. I am a 70 year old woman who is married to another woman. She is 67. Our daughter (born to me from a previous marriage to a man) is 34. I would say that we are both gender fluid and prefer not to be especially at either end of the spectrum. It is just not natural or comfortable to be one or the other. We are both bisexual, but choose to be with each other in a marriage. This is my longest relationship at 27 years now since we met. Our daughter was 7 at that time. Her father decided to move away to another State, so Jayne and I have been her primary parents. Her father died in 2017.
In terms of what you said about diabetes, I hope you know that type 1 diabetes has no cure and that no amount of “work” will change that reality. Jayne and I both have type 1 diabetes. She was diagnosed at age 4, I was at age 19. We both manage it well and have avoided major complications with tools like insulin pumps and glucose sensors. We also make diet and exercise a priority.
I also have a Substack where I share about my healing journey from Complex PTSD as well as my path as an artist and a Healer.
As a child with 3 sisters and 2 brothers I was lost in the middle. My mom would tell me I was beautiful on the inside but then add God did not bless me with outward beauty like my sisters. My constant companions became my brothers. I did not have a date until I was 18 and it was with the beautiful man I married who told me from day one I was pretty. I began wearing makeup, dressing more feminine. I never understood or had heard of the masculine, feminine energy until recently. I understand it now. I still fall back into old beliefs, especially when around my sisters but I have come a long way from the shy, closed off child. I know God loves me, inside and out. Thank you, Paola and Graham, for this heartfelt conversation!
For me it’s never recognizing my self worth. I love my career and I’m confident at what I do as a virtual assistant, and I know I’m in the beginning stages but suddenly I feel myself getting very tired and exhausted all the time. I think partly it’s a self worth issue.
I also have an anxious/avoidant attachment that I am healing from childhood wounds. I was always the adult in my family. I was always alone. So being around new people or even good friends can make me nervous and anxious and fearful.
I’ve been so used to doing things alone I tend to forget it’s okay to rest and ask for help.
One of my wounds that came up tonight is my abandonment wound. I grew up in a very dysfunctional family.
Another one is my safety/money wound.
I was never taught what safe felt like and I often grew up trusting older men and praying they were safe thinking that’s how safety felt. It wasn’t until my early 30s that I started realizing how much trauma I carried.
Goodness I didn’t realize I still had so many :(
This podcast was excellent. I had a incident when I was 16 and working. It was buried so deep in my heart. I am now in my 70's, hadn't thought about it in a very long time. I was attacked by a middle age man while getting in my car after work. When I spoke to my mom, told her what happened, the man was arrested and fired. She said to me we must never speak of this again. Thinking now maybe this why I have difficulties meeting and talking with people. I am so grateful and blessed to have you both in my life. I will work on this.
Paola and Graham, thanks for the replay of this episode, I was only able to watch part of the live, appreciate the replay to hear the entire episode. Growing up I my parents worked together as partners, they each had their own roles: mom was the “homemaker “, dad was the “ provider”, their roles at times they had to step into each others roles for a bit. There were times when I felt “ lost” as I was a middle child, I knew my parents loved me but felt my older brother and younger sister got more accolades for their accomplishments than I did..I was just okay. I feel that is where my low self-esteem/ feelings of low self worth began, it’s taken me years to rewrite the story of feeling worthy in my life and still struggle with it. Just recently it’s been very challenging for me as those childhood feeling have been resurfacing .
In my married life, my husband and I worked as partners, embracing both feminine and masculine sides at various times. I feel we both were able to step into and out of the two energies at various times in our relationship and family life. After he passed, I had to become both for myself and my children, which at times was a struggle as I just needed my partner there to help. It was an adjustment for me. My question to you, Graham and Paola, what are your thoughts regarding having to step back into that duel role full time after years of being able to step in and out of the roles? Thanks for the insightful and heartfelt conversation. Blessings!
I wish I had seen this live, but I was traveling. I was in a regarding the scars that we come from my youth, and I don’t think as a child I was scarred. I think it was as I became a teen. I was constantly compared to other people and some of the remarks from my mother we’re not very pleasant, but I learned to balance that by finding my dad‘s happy disposition and so I always took his side and became the happy-go-lucky
My father abandon me and my family when I was six years old after my 5 week old brother passed away I couldn't understand why he did that. After awhile I understood he couldn't handle the situation as the oldest girl in the family but I couldn't forget what he did after awhile for several years I for gave him,
I really enjoyed this episode I have wounds that I have been trying to get past and I have been doing well at leaving what happened in the past and moving forward to live my life happier because I can’t change what happened in my past I can only go forward so thank you graham and Paola I wish the best on your journeys I wish you a lot of luv prayers and hugs I luv listening to both of you thanks for helping understand things better I wish I had someone like you two in my earlier and younger age to help me navigate my life maybe I would have been more happier in my younger years and also did things a lot differently thanks again 😊❤️
Paola and Graham. Thanks for the reply. I feel that I am definitely like my mother, both having to be the masculine and feminine for the family and with her recent passing even more soo.
I love that you two embraced this subject. I haven't heard this kind of dialogue. There was so much propaganda about other gender BS being forced down our throats. They tried do emasculate men. As an old soul it seams I only remember feminine. I was fortunate that my parents were excellent. My father was a saintly man. He showed me what a good man should be. Girls were mean to me and my wise mom told me it was only because I was pretty and smart that they were jealous.❤️❤️❤️
Paola, I too am an old soul. I understand you. Today I get that Graham is a trigger for me. I believe it is from years of following and seeing sides that often felt very confusing. I know after watching this that I need to trust my inner voice that tells me “no more.” I keep stepping in and out and I will follow the exit sign. I wish you both an adventure that is fulfilling and rewarding. Be happy and be well.
What do you mean by Graham is a trigger for you? I’m sincerely confused why you would say this with out an explanation.
I have been married almost 10 years and I have learned to always work with within yourself.
Jülia
Ana María lo siento pero
Cu ni con quién puedo hablar para
Buenas tardes adjunto envío el archivo adjunto envío el
Juegos de los si es posible 202
I am trying to make myself worthy of my life I have. Have trouble feeling that I am not good enough, insecure with my life and don't know where to go from here to feel like I am worthy of myself and life
Girl you suck
I would recommend watching the documentary called Crip Camp which is a tribute to the Disabled Community. It is a wonderful way to witness the pride of that community with physical and mental differences from people who are Able Bodied. My ex husband and father of our daughter was born with cerebral palsy from damage to his brain at birth. Both his speech and movement was impacted. He taught me a lot about living with disabilities including ones that are invisible to other people like mine. On Netflix and YouTube. Executive producers were the Obama’s. Both Steve and Emily Hofmann are included in this film released in 2020.
I enjoyed watching this episode which was very thought provoking for me. I am a 70 year old woman who is married to another woman. She is 67. Our daughter (born to me from a previous marriage to a man) is 34. I would say that we are both gender fluid and prefer not to be especially at either end of the spectrum. It is just not natural or comfortable to be one or the other. We are both bisexual, but choose to be with each other in a marriage. This is my longest relationship at 27 years now since we met. Our daughter was 7 at that time. Her father decided to move away to another State, so Jayne and I have been her primary parents. Her father died in 2017.
In terms of what you said about diabetes, I hope you know that type 1 diabetes has no cure and that no amount of “work” will change that reality. Jayne and I both have type 1 diabetes. She was diagnosed at age 4, I was at age 19. We both manage it well and have avoided major complications with tools like insulin pumps and glucose sensors. We also make diet and exercise a priority.
I also have a Substack where I share about my healing journey from Complex PTSD as well as my path as an artist and a Healer.